I have completed phase 1 of my training here at HEART.
I have met and now know 8 other incredible students along with the staff and volunteers.
The beginning was full of laughter as we got a feel for one another. Surface level questions of where we live, how many siblings we have, what year in school, what we like to do for fun, etc.
First impressions are priceless. How often we are wrong, not because others put off a different imagethan who they really are, but instead because we carry too many assumptions based on our life and project them.
The surface was broken quickly though. After the first night followed a full day of sharing testimonies and prayer. We laughed and we cried. Knowing that we would be living together, working together, going to class together, and spending free time together we felt no need to felt the initiation of vulnerability. The way I see it: if I expect others to be vulnerable and desire for the to be then I myself must be just as if not more willing to do so. And rather than building a relationship on surface level laughter only to create awkwardness when you try to open up and be serious, why not start with vulnerability to create that atmosphere and attitude?
I have laughed with my lab group when the animals doing ridiculous things and I have shared some of my deepest insecurities with the very same people. It is so beautiful. I am learning, being challenged, and hopefully even teaching some. Last weekend we went on a two day canoe/wilderness trip. During this time I was able to be overwhelmed and calmed by God's wonderful creation all around me. I am speaking of the nature and people. There was life-giving conversation in the midst of so much life around me.
A few things I've come to conclude this far in my life:
-everyone has something to teach. Always. This teaching happens in two ways. 1. The Lord does something in your life, teaches, speaks, transforms, and the result of that is shared with others. You either teach the lesson, speak the words, or interact and live in a new way because of the transformation 2. You deny the Lord's doing and push your own way thus resulting in teaching others what it looks like to not live into God's desires for your life.
-vulnerability is crucial so we must be willing to share, but vulnerability without ears to listen is selfish and unproductive. Growing in community occurs when you are open and you allow others to be.
A reflection from my journal about living for others:
By Your breath I was made
Out of nothingness You made life
Life that is not just for life
Life that was meant for lives
To reach, connect, expose
Your life, Your truth, Your way
To be one with You
Yet, You in others is what I am to pursue